Something Beautiful

Laughing babies who are now 10, 8 and 5
That knowing smile from my husband
A note from a friend
Promises that all is well and will be as He gathers everything that's beautiful

Can't think of a Title for this one...

Ever had one of those time in life that things aren't happening that way you thought they would? Ever question if the decisions you've made were bad, oh so bad? Ever wondered just when it was that God would finally show up? Well, that's been me (actually us - hubby and I ) lately. Things are starting to come together now, but a week ago, not so much.

We sold our house in "smallsville" Saskatchewan fully believing God was leading us to move closer to our families. The place sold quickly, dh had cased a teaching job in the area we'd felt lead to and we were on our way. However, this chicken who likes to have her ducks in a row was about to have the proverbial rug pulled out from under her. We'd sold our place and moved out of it assuming (like dummies) that finding another place would be as easy as it had been last time. Our household goods would only need to be in storage in that reclaimed stock trailer (ya, like the ones for cows...) for only a short while, right? Nope. Apparently purchasing a "doesn't need $30,000 worth of fixing" house in "not as smallsville" would prove to be quite a challenge. More so because we'd really had our hearts set on a chunk of land to put a few cattle and chickens on, but I'll tell you about that another day. In short, we were without a home of our own for five weeks. We were homeless. HOMELESS!
I should interject at this point and tell you that we are staying at dh's folks place (gracious them!) and I really have no complaints. They have been so accommodating even allowing our old kitty to wander in and out as he pleases. But it is strange to live in someone else's house; I'm always on edge wanting to be a good house guest, tidy and helpful, keeping the kids in check. And it's kind of eerie the way you really get to know people when you live with them. I mean really get to know them, in the wish I'd never heard/seen that kind of way. Oh well.

But, God did show up. Or rather WE finally saw Him. I know He'd been there all along. We did find a place, sorted out our financing which I won't tell you about because that's still a very sore, angry place, and signed papers to move in next week. Our junk is still in the trailer and we're still living with the parents and there's still a pile of work ahead of us, but knowing our destination makes it all seem better somehow.

I think our lives as believers should be like that. We know where we're headed in the ends so all this other stuff that clutters our lives and frustrates us should be less so. I like what Paul said about looking forward to what lies ahead, forgetting the past and finishing strong. Hmm. That's last bit was just for me I think.

I have No Idea

As I said a while back, we are in the midst of moving. We've known for some time that we desired to relocate. Somewhere closer to home, family. So now we're doing it. We put the house up on the market, nervously waited for "lookers" to take interest, cleaned and re-cleaned frantically, and waited some more. Suddenly we had a couple of offers, one that made us a little offended and one that was great! It's somehow self affirming when people like your house enough to offer you $$ for it. I don't know why; I'm not my house, but the fact that they liked something that much to give us their hard earned cash made me feel better about having to have kept it SO clean. We accepted their offer.

Now, we're waiting on God to provide us the rest of the pieces of this ulcer waiting in the wings puzzle. Michael needs a teaching job, we need a house to live in. We have a general idea of where we're being lead, just no specifics. I'm a detail girl. I like my duckies in a row. A neat tidy row. At this point though, I have no idea about all these details.

Never before have we repeated the same prayers. There have been many times where we've had to trust God to provide those seemingly last minute answers, but this time seems to be bigger. More on the line. In my heart I know He will work things out, He promises that and we've seen it happen in the darkest of times. It's my head that screams out, "Aaagghhhhhhhhhhhh! What's the next step?!AND WE"RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!!!"

The song playing on the Christian network right now...I believe you are my portion, you are more than enough for me, Jesus you're all I need. (I have no idea who the group is, irrelevant.)
I guess that's what I get for today. Maybe not the answers I would like RIGHT NOW, but simply...Jesus. That's all I need.

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it."
Isaiah 30:21

Packing boxes. Sale sign on the front lawn. Hearts prepared.
We're moving.
For some time we've ached to be closer to family. Now's the time.
We don't know all the details yet, you know, the important stuff like work or a house. But God does and we'd fall on our faces if He didn't show up. He will.
So while we wait, I'm relearning not to be totally freaked out about standing on the edge of cliffs.

Let me off this Merry-Go-Round

Ever heard that saying, generally spoken of small towns strewn about across the prairies, "If you blink you'll miss it."? That's sort of how life has been around here lately. I've been working at both schools lately which makes life hectic on any day, but paired with school meetings, piano recital and festival, selling a house, and of course the arrival of spring (ie: a half acre yard needing to be raked, trees trimmed, plant beds cleaned, and a whole shwack of work)...all that makes my little head spin.


While zipping around the other day it occurred to me that my van had enough "emergency" provisions in it to feed, clothe and entertain a small nation. I realized that for more than a couple of weeks my kids, who are the type that truly need their sleep, had been going to bed late and getting up early resulting in a terrible chronic grouchiness. Left over left-overs were becoming the norm and I hadn't actually cleaned the bathroom properly, just those quick once overs with the t.p. around my porcelain friend to catch the hair and fuzz. I've spent more time cleaning (well, you know, wiping) sorting, raking, piling, driving and waiting in lines than I've spent with my family lately. Granted we do most of this stuff together, but it's becoming exhausting trying to make all this work "fun" for the kids. And they're not appreciating all this, er, fun to be had.

I know there are busy seasons in life and down times as well. This week has far fewer commitments which I'm grateful for. I don't know how people live like that all the time. I enjoy having my time at home. I like having time to clean properly. Well planned meals are so much more enjoyable than something thrown together spur of the moment 'cuz eggs, spaghetti and sour crout don't really go together all that well. There's a huge difference in the mood around our house when I take the time to spend with the kids reading, playing or even just talking. I feel like I can do climb Mt. Everest when hubby and I can sit for even 10 minutes and encourage one another. In those busy times I feel pulled in so many directions that it becomes harder and harder to really listen to my Heavenly Father. And then I just feel plain guilty for not having the time for everything. For anything. Especially the important stuff.

Sometimes I envy Moses when he was out in the dessert tending to the sheep. Sure it was hot and dusty. And perhaps the sheep were a little ornery at times. I would be too if I had to wear wool all year long. But it was likely quiet. There was likely time to just sit and think. Time to poke around at the plants at your feet. Time to really engross yourself in conversation if someone happened by or brought you lunch. (Did they do that back then? I dunno.)

I think the song writer Chris Rice has a song with something to the effect that we're all given the same commodity in the same amount. The same 24 hours for each day. How we spend our time costs us and we end up with less to spend else where. I'll post the song here if I come across it again.

So, I'm done for now. How's your busy life? I pray you've time to enjoy His blessings.

Spring Fever

Spring fever has hit around here. It must have...the cats yowling all night, strays spraying my doors, which is DISGUSTING!!, and I'm cleaning the house like a wild woman. Martha Stewart, bring it on. Even our eldest, after a whole day of us sorting and purging in his bedroom, emphatically anounced "WOW! I love having a clean room!!"
Music to a mothers ears...

Side note: Suzanne, I neglected to link your new blog on here, that's why I haven't visited lately. I hope you leave a comment so I can find you!

Lord, give me the patience to celebrate each blessed day that I watch my children grow. Amen.

Burnt cookies and a Broken Heart

I hate burnt cookies. It sucks when a new recipe turns out non-edible no matter how meticulously I follow the directions. I really do try to be creative in the kitchen but when something turns out just plain disgusting it makes me wonder if the author of the recipe actually likes the taste of skunk tail. So, with all of the tried and failed cooking happenings, I tend to complain. Selfishly complain. I like food, but I really like it when it tastes good. I pride myself on feeding my family healthy, beneficial food. You know, balanced meals, full of nutrition and all that.

It's been an eye opener to follow the headlines and coverage on the situation in Haiti. I saw a guy the other night haul off with a bag of rice he'd basically stolen off an aide truck trying to get thru the city. There was a whole mob of people fighting to nab something out of the back of the still moving vehicle. Fighting for something, anything to feed their hungry families. Happy with a bag of rice...so desperate that a bag of rice alone could make them happy.

I shake my head at how much I have. I turn on the light switch and the lights go on. Flick the tap, out comes the water. Open the fridge and actually decide from the many choices, what to have for a meal or a snack. I actually complained the other day that there wasn't enough room in the fridge and cupboards for the just purchased groceries we "needed". We are so blessed to live where we live. I don't know who said it, but it's true that we here in North America have won the lottery. Sure we have our hardships...but our -40C in the winter hardly compares to not even having a roof over head, no food and not knowing whether or not your family is still alive. WE ARE SO BLESSED! And my heart breaks for all those mothers in Port of Prince who would love to even have a kitchen to prepare a meal in, food to nourish their little ones. A family to hold.

Heavenly Father, comfort the people of Haiti. Help those of us so blessed to find ways to help them.

What me, paint? A picture?!

I've taken up a bit of a project with the help of a newly-made artist friend. Kelly
an accomplished artist and her hubby, have recently moved to our small town. We were introduced to them through other friends and she and I have had opportunity to share stories, faith and of course pots of Bengal Spice Tea. The project, which began with a "hey, cool frame..." sort of comment as I breezed through her porch one chilly fall day, has had me on the go for a while. It's a great old nine pane window frame, painted a light greenish hue, that simply begged to have something interesting added to it. Kelly's so generous. Her reply was "Ya, you want it?" So now my lil' brain has been all a wonder with what to put into it. We, actually she, streched and prepped the canvas peices in it. (I helped a little.) Now it's time to paint something in it. Being that I am only midly creative when it comes to painting, I've taken my creative brain online to see if some bit of inspiration might skip across my path. That got me to thinking "hey, my blogging friends are all artsy types in one genre or another." So spill it you creative brains, give me your ideas. Here are a few themes I've toyed with. And for those of you wondering, yes, I am a copycat. Possibly lazy too. But that could be the holidays talking. Cheers!